Mâlain Diaries 4 - Inter - jection

Mâlain Diaries 4   Inter - jection

I’m sorry, I didn’t get that selection.

I press 4 in the person-game-of-roulette.

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I’m sorry we didn’t get that selection.

Press 1 if you are having trouble coping.

Press 2 if you need information on selection rage.

Press 14* if you need to hear these choices again.

I’m sorry we didn’t get that selection.

Press 3 if you need to speak to a robot.

Press 4 if you need a call-centre employee

   with a fake accent.

Press 5 if you are experiencing frustration

   with your service.

You can find answers to most of your questions

online

where you can’t connect nor interlope @

   www.fuckingendlessloop.com

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I’m sorry we didn’t get that selection.

We make our money despite this shit.

Press 6 if you’re running out of

minutes and need to use more

waiting

waiting

time.

Press 7 if you’re waiting for someone

   while you had to go to the toilet.

Press 8 if we billed you for triple the ‘data’

   & there’s really no way to verify it.

Take our word.

It will work.

I’m sorry we are experiencing higher-than-

   normal call volumes. Because we are high.

(We have to be.)

Press 9 if you’re about to throw

a unit

off the ledge.

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I’m sorry we didn’t get that selection.

Goodbye.